Aug. 08, 2003 - 12:39 a.m.
Dear Vincent,
I've an unequivocal fondness for weeping willows. Besides being the tree most sympathetic to any plight you may have, they also strike me as a very poetic tree. There is only one in close proximity to my home. It's on a rather treacherous bend in a back road veiling a sneeze of a house. There's very little I'd like better than to go and sit beneath that tree. But to do that, I suppose I'd have to become acquainted with the people that reside in the house. And therein lies the hang up. You see, I'm too old to pretend I'm a girl scout, so I couldn't just show up at their door and pretend to sell cookies whereby striking up a lifelong friendship in the process. Besides I have no cookies. Until I come up with a more foolproof scheme I'll have to only admire the tree in passing as I zip around the bend ten miles faster than I should.
Today my friend Dylan and I hiked through the state park near my home. As we neared a part of the path which passed between a cliff and the river Dylan gestured to the cliff and said, "It's really fun to sit up on that cliff and" indicating the river, "haggle the people in the kayaks that pass by." Haggle? I thought. Did he say "haggle the people?" Slip of the tongue I concluded. Looking at him with every effort to conceal the laughter bubbling in my stomach I asked, "Dylan, don't you mean heckle the people going by in kayaks?" Then, t'was his turn to look at me confusedly as he confirmed, "No, I meant haggle." "Are you sure?" I asked. "Yes." he said with mild annoyance. I assumed he was being stubborn and we walked on as I silently laughed.
Barely ten minutes later, a kayak glided by trailing ripples with a man in a blue shirt and helmet inside. Cupping his hands to his mouth Dylan bellowed, "HEY BUDDY! I'LL GIVE YA TEN DOLLARS FOR THAT KAYAK?" The man ceased rowing momentarily to regard Dylan with astonished bemusement. "THAT'S A LITTLE CHEAP DON'T YOU THINK?" he retorted. Dylan sighed and considered, then perking up offered, "OKAY I'LL GIVE YA THIRTY BUT ONLY IF YOU THROW IN THE HELMET." The man laughed and began to paddle again, refusing Dylan's offer by shooting downstream presenting us with a view of his shoulders, shaking with laughter. Dylan first looked discouraged, then he turned to me and said, matter of fact, "SEE? Haggle. It's fun to haggle the kayakers." Vincent, I shall never doubt again. Oh ye of little faith.
Is it 'All roads lead to Rome?' or 'All roads lead through Rome?'
I will also be paying a visit to the dentist soon. Apparently, I'm to have my wisdom teeth ripped out. Apparently, I should have had it done a few years ago. Apparently, my dentist failed to notice way back when. It is apparent that my dentist now is confused about why my dentist then didn't notice. I have a theory. It was very apparent then, that my dentist had a thing for the woman who cleaned teeth. Maybe he spent a little too much time looking into her eyes, rather than at my teeth. Sigh. I would feel much better about the whole process if they would just call them 'bad' teeth, or 'mean' teeth, or 'you don't need them completely painless to have them out' teeth. Alas, they call them wisdom teeth. The name seems to imply that I'll be losing more than they've led me to believe.
Today I also bought a new pair of sneakers. Or tennis shoes. But I won't be doing any sneaking around in them, and consequently, I don't play tennis. What you will.
Sometimes I want things so badly that I hope I don't get them. Because if I got them, it would complicate things tremendously. The example I will use is a rather shallow one, but it will serve its purpose. At least once in every girl's life, she walks past a dress in a store window. And it just stops her in her tracks. It's absolutely stunning and everything about it seems to be made for her. She tries to walk past, but it would take far more than iron will. Her feet just won't take her anywhere else but to try on that dress. She fights it, standing rooted to the spot but she knows it's a battle she'll loose. Drawn helplessly into the store she approaches it knowing that wearing a dress like that she would never look better in her life. The reality check would be the price tag. She stares at it in horror caught between wanting to feel like a goddess in that dress and the knowledge that she will scrimp and pinch for months if she buys it. She is drawn to the dressing room with the dress cradled in her arms. And with all her heart, she hopes that the dress will look like shit. Because she knows that if it looks good, nothing will ever look better on her. So she will have to find a way to buy it. And that would make everything unavoidably, uncomfortably tough for a time. Is there any greater challenge in life Vincent? It seems to me, that there isn't. Finding the point where what you've always wanted, and what seems perfect for you isn't worth it and when it is. This is just the trouble when I fall in love with things. Oh look what love hath wrought.
It is time again, to get my typewriter fixed. One year, they won't be able to fix it any longer. And then a part of my heart will be gone. There's something so reassuring in the steady knocking of the keys on my typewriter. Something that makes me feel more like a writer than when I sit in front of the computer. Holding the piece of paper in my hand, the solidity of a hard copy. I can only hope that this is not that year that they won't be able to fix it. My fingers are tightly crossed, so it is convenient my typewriter is broken because with my fingers crossed I can't type.
Habitually,
Meghan
what they said - what they will say
